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The Hard Decisions


Sometimes you have to make a decision you don’t want to make.  Sometimes you have to make a decision with a relationship based on your principles.  Sometimes you have to make a hard decision where you feel your hand is forced and you have no other choice.  I’m here to tell you that “sometimes” does come and all you can do is stick to your principles and do what needs to be done.


Principles are what can help us take the emotion out of things.  It can allow us to make the hard decisions when our heart is telling us we can’t do something that needs to be done.  The heart can weigh heavy in a relationship where you don’t want to have to do something that you’re being forced to do.  If you stick to your principles, you can sorta take the emotion out of the decision.  You can do what needs to be done even though your heart doesn’t want to.

It Can Temporarily Change You

When you have to make a decision based on principles, it can temporarily change you.  You may do or say some things out of character.  In my experience, that’s because you know your hand is being forced to make a decision you don’t want to make.  This can make you angry and make you want to make the other person understand by you becoming more emotional and aggressive.  You don’t want to do what you have to do but you have to do what needs to be done.

It Can Be Tough

When you have to do something you don’t want to do, it can make you question the person you’re trying to be.  It makes you want to say, “Screw it all.”  It makes you question why you’re trying to be a better person and make the concessions for people who are not as “enlightened” as you.  Now I use the word “enlightened” loosely, but what I’m saying is that you start to question why you’re trying to be a better person when the world around you doesn’t seem to care, or worse yet, tries to take advantage.  It can be tough.  It can cost you sleep, motivation, and discipline.  Not to mention, break your heart.

Go Back To Your Principles

When these hard decisions are made, and you start to question why you’re even trying to be that better person, that’s when you need to double down on your principles.  You need to go back to the disciplines in life that bring you joy and happiness.  It’s like when you know you need to do something you committed to doing, but don’t feel like doing it.  For example, when you committed to exercising every Friday after work, but every Friday you talk yourself out of it because you’ve “had a hard week.”  That’s when it’s most important to do the task…to do what you’ve committed to do.  Because doing the task when you don’t want to, is one of the best ways of strengthening a discipline or habit.

The Takeaway

Sometimes life is going to throw things your way you don’t want, and often times it has to do with relationships.  When those relationships are strained, you have to make your decisions based on your principles and then you have to go back to those principles that made you make a decision your heart didn’t want to make.  This is tough, to say the least.  And I’m afraid we’ll all be tested like this in our lives.

From my experience, all I can say is, stick to your principles.  Even though you may not like the outcome, you can be sure you’re making the right decision despite the pain it can cause you.  In time, you’ll learn from the experience and what your principles were teaching you.  It’ll strengthen your disciplines and make you stronger.  But in the short term…yeah…it’s tough making those hard decisions.

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